Leonie Marks

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Horstmann
Refresher

Sat June 7th
2 – 4pm

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5 Tips to Overcome Your “Button Pushers” during the Holiday Season!

Do you spend the holiday season cruising from one gathering to another, enjoying catching up

with friends and family, revelling in the party atmosphere?

Or is it a spiral of increasing anxiety? Worrying about getting everything just right and living

up to the expectations of your “Button Pushers”?

There’s always one – that special person who has you feeling like a blithering, inadequate

mess at 20 paces? Regardless of how perfect your presentation.

Been there, done that! To the point I wanted to cancel the holiday season out-right. Failing

that - slink off quietly somewhere and go into hibernation.

As the creator’s of our own reality – we can easily choose either of those options – BUT it

doesn’t solve the problem.

So lets re-program your buttons – before they go off, with increasing pitch.

You’ll have lots more fun in the holiday season and emerge feeling lighter and freer within

yourself.

5 Tips to Overcome Your “Button Pushing” Relationships:

1. Breathe

Yes I’m serious, when you’re caught up in knots about what that particular colleague, friend,

relative (the button-pusher) is going to think, say or do, you won’t be breathing.

Welcome the day! Instead of groaning “Good grief, its morning” - go outside and say “Good

morning” to your world.

Take 5 deep belly breathes, exhaling slowly and fully.

Throughout the day, your head will be clearer, you will feel calmer and more grounded.

Close your day in the same way for a better nights sleep.

2. Sack Ms Perfect

Ms Perfect, aka Superwoman, is alive and well in each of us. With her need for approval, she

has a knack for attracting “Button Pushers”. She’s got no time for fun. Way too busy living up

to her own impossible expectations.

Sadly, she’ll never get 100% world-wide approval and she’ll never be happy with anything

less.

Ms Perfect is a bottomless pit that will drain you and your relationships.

So, its time to sack her!

Give her a retrenchment party – thank her and let her go.

Why not invite your girlfriends, mothers, aunts & even your “button-pushers” to join you, have

a mass sacking and celebrate together!

That done, your “button” is going to be much less reactive.

Now, beware the sneaky “Button-Pusher”, there’ll still be one and they’ll probably catch you

unaware! Seize the opportunity to take the next step. . .

3. Reacting vs Responding

Reacting zaps your energy.

Reacting when your button is pushed – is like having your remote control change channels

without your permission. Suddenly you’re “off the air” and feeling out of control.

Its a natural defence to being threatened. It’s also a disempowering, bad habit. You can

change that!

Awareness is the first step, it takes away the threat and the need to react.

Are you aware of what’s going on inside your “Button Pusher”?

Your button-pusher is not all powerful and confident – this is just the glossy facade.

Inside they feel anxious and fearful of judgment – they are certainly not empowered.
They are not consciously aware of this.
Their behaviour towards you is not intentional.
It is a reaction stemming from their sub-conscious patterning.
Your reaction to them comes from the same place, within you.

That’s worth reflecting on!

Responding

Next time your button is pushed:

Breathe – deeply! Several times.
Remove yourself from their presence if you need to.
This gives you time to see what’s going on inside the “Button Pusher”
And to reflect on what’s going on inside yourself.
Don’t buy into their issue, its not about right or wrong, winning or losing.
Focus on managing yourself.

When you do this, you’ll stay balanced and feel safe. The need to react will dissolve.

Now you can respond assertively. Without losing your energy or power.

You could smile and move on – or even make a positive comment – as long as it comes from

your truth and is not forced.

What you do or say will take care of itself because you will be responding not reacting – the

negativity is gone.

You’ll feel great, so…

4. Celebrate

Congratulations!

You have significantly changed the energy of your relationship with your self and every other

person in your life.

Your button is responding

Now, you’ll find you have an early warning system, that lets you know if you’re about to react.

That will give you time to choose to Respond or React.

You can enjoy the events that used to cause you all that reactive stress. No more

apprehension about who might be there to upset your balance and spoil your fun!

5. Attitude of Gratitude

Find something in your relationship with your “Button Pushers” to be grateful for.

For me, it was a real breakthrough the day I realised my “Button-Pushers” were also my

greatest teachers.

My ego was humbled and I felt genuine gratitude. I even thanked some of them in person.

Very liberating!

Many people seek help for this kind of relationship stress, over the holiday season. If you’ve

experienced holiday seasons like this in the past, then I trust you’ll have a breakthrough too!

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